One of the things I think has the biggest impact on my anxiety is my career.. or perhaps my lack of one.
I have a great degree, from a top university and was on the career path of becoming a solicitor… until I realised very recently that was 100% not what I wanted to do.
Finding clarity in my mind has been pretty hard.. I had this expectation on myself that when I graduated university I had to follow certain career paths.. lawyer, accountant, consultant… like most of the other people I was graduating with. It is only now that I realise this was completely the wrong decision for me – I think partially I was drawn in by the higher salaries of these jobs, or perhaps it was a sort of self created peer pressure to compete with everyone else.
Saying that.. I now find myself a year and a half or so later, having completed a law conversion in job that really I don’t want to be in.
Finding exactly what I want to do is the tricky part.. I don’t want to decide to quickly and make another wrong decision but at the same time my current position is really starting to affect me. I dread going to work in the morning, find myself bored and can’t wait to leave at the end of the day. at the same time.. because of the atmosphere I am in I often find my self staying later than I need because I genuinely don’t want to make a bad impression and I do work hard.
I want to find a career I genuinely enjoy am interested by and look forward to progressing in. I appreciate there are going to be dull elements to most jobs but is that really too much to ask for?
At the moment I am trying to go about the best way of looking for something. It is proving fairly difficult but then I am willing to keep looking for something because for me I think this is a huge part in my happiness.
I don’t want to wish every week away just looking forward to the weekends…and I don’t think I have to.
It starts with something…
Today is the first day of the rest of your life.